Ramblin' with Roger

Christmas Meme, Part 2

Grade/Rate Holiday Movies A – F

91. A Christmas Story. B+

92. How The Grinch Stole Christmas? A+ if we’re talking Chuck Jones. Never saw Ron Howard’s.

93. The Santa Clause? Have I ever seen any of these all the way through?

94. Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer? B

95. Frosty The Snowman? B-

96. Home Alone? B-

97. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation? D-

98. Elf? Didn’t see

99. Miracle on 34th Street? A

100. A Charlie Brown Christmas? A+

Christmas At My House…(one or the other)

111. Tree is fake/real?

Real, optimally. Though in fact we had no tree when Lydia was nine months old because we were too tired to bother. We didn’t have one when she was 21 months because we feared she’d pull it down.

112. Tree is under/above 4′?

About 5′ most years, though this years is 7′.

113. Open presents Christmas Eve/Day?

Christmas Day. Though there may be stockings opened on Christmas Eve.

114. House/entire yard is decorated?

We don’t decorate the outside.

115. Amount of presents under the tree?

Very few before Christmas Eve.

116. Snowman is a male/female?

Lydia made one Sunday. Male.

117. Go for Santa/Jesus?

I’m not sure what that means.

118. Homemade/delivered/takeout Christmas dinner?

Usually homemade if I’m not making it; otherwise, takeout.

119. Bedtime is before/after midnight?

10 pm most nights.

120. Wake-up is before/after 7am?

Probably 5:30 now. When I was a kid, Dad pushed the wakeup time for the household later and later, from 7 when I was 7 to 9 when I was 16.

121. Go/don’t go to church on Christmas?

Don’t, generally, though I did once or twice recently. Christmas Eve, I go to, usually sing at. Even in my non-church-going phase, I’d go to Christmas Eve, usually a Catholic service. And I’ve never been Catholic.

122. Pray & sing Happy Birthday/do nothing before bed?

I sometimes pray. But “Happy Birthday, Jesus” is hysterical! Jesus almost certainly was a Pisces; seriously.

123. Do shopping before/after Thanksgiving?

If I’m inspired, I shop before Thanksgiving. I was shopping this Sunday past, so that should tell you something.

124. Low-key/over the top decorations (inside and out)?

Low-key.

Have You Ever?

125. Built a snowman?
Of course.

126. Heard Santa’s sleigh?
Yes. Must have been a recording. Wasn’t it?

127. Seen Santa & Rudolph in the sky?
Well, no, except in my dreams.

128. Sat on Santa’s lap?
I know I have. There’s even a picture somewhere. But I don’t really have any memories of it.

129. Shoveled the driveway/sidewalk?
Ugh, yes.

130. Made snow angels?
Yes.

131. Built a fort/igloo?
Yep.

132. Wrote a Christmas list?
Yes.

133. Wrote a letter to Santa?
Yes.

134. Left cookies/milk for Santa & reindeer?
Yes, ever since we had a child. But remember doing so when I was a child.

135. Caught a snowflake on your tongue?
Of course.

136. Went caroling?
Used to do it every year for about a decade and a half.

137. Got hurt during the winter season?
Just the frostbite.

138. Gone ice skating/sledding?
I’m lousy at skating. Sledding I did regularly as a kid.

139. Kissed under a mistletoe?
Yes.

140. Experienced/saw a miracle happen?
Maybe.

141. Get everything you wanted for Christmas?
Yes, but my needs are limited.

142. Cooked/baked?
There was a period that I did both, mostly when I was single.

True Or False

181. You prefer to stay inside where it’s warm?
Truer words were never spoken.

182. You’ve given something (or $) to charity?
Very True.

183. You spent more than what people spent on you?
Almost always true.

184. You like to take your time opening presents?
True, and try to apply the brakes to the child.

185. The thing you want most this year costs $100+?
True, but that’s MOST unusual.

186. You expect to get more than 10 presents this year?
False.

187. You’re a Scrooge/Grinch?
I don’t think so.

188. Christmas = snow?
True, lightly on Christmas Eve.

189. You know the lyrics to more than 25 Christmas songs?
Oh, indeed true. I love Christmas music. I have three or four BOOKS.

Grab Bag

190. Three best things about Christmas?
The music, the decorations, the possibilities.

191. Worst Christmas song?
I especially hate “Dominick the Donkey”.

192. If you were a Christmas character, who would you be?
Bob Cratchit.

193. What type of decoration should stop being made?
Any that are poisoning the environment.

194. Tastiest holiday treat?
Sugar cookies.

195. Favorite pop culture Christmas icon?
I like Charlie Brown and his little tree.

196. Know how to make cookies/brownies/cake from scratch?
I did; haven’t done it in so long, though.

197. Ever cut your mouth on a candy cane/candy?
Yes, as a kid.

198. What other culture would you like to experience Christmas with?
Interested to do so in the Southern Hemisphere.

199. What kind of pattern/pictures do you like on your wrapping paper?
Wrapping paper is a real sore point. I used to think that it was dumb. I would just as soon use the funnies from the Sunday newspaper, but was mocked for it. Now it’s rather ahead of the curve environmentally. So I REALLY don’t care.

200. Will you make a Christmas picture for your blog/website/profile?
Nah, I’m a lazy bum.

ROG

Christmas Meme, Part 1

There is this meme that SamuraiFrog did. Then Jaquandor found some more. But neither of them are as long as this one. So I’m splitting it; half today, half tomorrow. OK, with the skips, it’s not really half. And I’m not renumbering this puppy.

Favorite Christmas…

01. Non-Jesus-related song?
“Good King Wenceslas”.

02. Jesus-related song?
The Coventry Carol; it’s on A Very Special Christmas #1. But then there are all the songs that I sing in choir. The first part of Handel Messiah. Lully, lulla, thou little tiny child. Almost anything in another language, from Adeste Fideles to Stille Nacht. And the Shepherd’s Farewell by Berlioz awes me every verse.

03. Santa-related song?
“Santa Claus Is Coming To Town”, the Jackson Five version.

04. Fictional character?
Ebeneezer Scrooge.

05. Dinner’s main course?
Variable. Can be turkey, ham or something else altogether.

06. Dinner’s dessert?
Also no tradition here.

07. Scent (pine, gingerbread, candles…)?
Pine.

08. Animated movie?
I can’t think of a Christmas-related animated movie I need to see every year. I did see A Charlie Brown Christmas. Oh, BTW, just came across the mashup of A Charlie Brown Christmas with Hey Ya by Outkast; it’ll be a while before I get tired of it.

09. Non-animated movie?
I’ve seen It’s A Wonderful Life. Not required (e.g., probably won’t see it this year.)

10. Personal memory?
So many, which I’ve mentioned before.

11. Story/Fairy Tale?
A Christmas Carol.

This or That

12. Candy cane or peppermint patties?
Probably the only time I eat candy canes. I prefer peppermint patties but don’t associate them with Christmas.

13. Sugar or gingerbread cookies?
Sugar.

14. Tinsel or beaded strands?
Grew up with tinsel. Now, neither.

15. Multi-colored or same-colored lights?
White. Grew up with multicolored.

16. Flashing or still lights?
Still. Grew up with flashing.

17. Wreaths or mistletoe/holly?
Wreaths, but that’s my wife.

18. Rudolph or Frosty?
Rudolph, because I relate to his oppression. Besides my daughter has a Frosty book and I find it creepy.

19. Sledding or snowball fights?
Incresingly, neither. I liked sledding as a kid, but since I got frostbite on my feet when I was 16, I just don’t play much outdoors.

20. Snow or ice/icicles?
Light snow.

21. Snow hat or earmuffs?
Hat.

22. Getting or giving?
I’ve lost (mostly) my getting vibe. Getting for Lydia is fun; the rest, not so much.

23. Snow days or plow trucks?
Plows. My wife and daughter have snow days and I’m jealous as hell.

24. Stockings or presents?
Both.

25. Cookies & milk or letter to Santa?
Both.

26. Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?
Christmas Eve for certain.

27. Log Burning Channel or real thing?
The real thing, though I currently don’t have the capacity.

28. Cards or emails?
Cards, though in fact this is is the first since Lydia was born that we’ve sent any (and only nine thus far.)

29. Shoveling or cleaning off the car?
I prefer shoveling. It’s a consistent motion. I went years without access to a car, so the hassle bothers me more. I live in the city so I don’t NEED a car.

30. The Inn’s manger or the animals?
Animals, a function of a Lydia book about the Christmas owl.

31. Mary & Joseph or The Wise Men?
I always played one of the Wise Men, so there’s that. Sang a Magnificat (Mary story) this past week, though, so it’s a tossup.

32. Hot cocoa or eggnog?
Eggnog, because I don’t associate hot cocoa with the season especially.

33. Jack Frost or Little Drummer Boy?
I used to sing Little Drummer Boy.

“Yay!” or “Ugh”:

34. Holiday shopping?
Ugh! (Though online has made it tolerable. Barely.)

35. Icy roads?
Ugh.

36. Limited driving visibility?
Well, ugh.

37. Christmas carolers.
Yay! (I’ve been one.)

38. Mall Santas?
Depends on the quality of the Santa.

39. Salvation Army Santas?
Yay! Love this improv bit!

40. Blizzards?
If I’m at work, Ugh. If I’m at home and I don’t have to go anywhere, Yay!

41. 24/7 Holiday radio?
Ugh! They play the same damn songs every other day. I’ll play my own, thank you. My wife is a Yay om this, BTW.

42. Freezing cold?
Ugh!

43. Setting up the tree?
Yay!

44. Wrapping presents?
Ugh. I stink at it.

45. Visiting/seeing family?
Feh. Doesn’t happen.

46. Ad-Lib on “Rudolph (like Monopoly!)
Does that bit have a more formal name? I find that it exists in lots of songs of that period, including Over the Rainbow and Try a Little Tenderness. Yay.

47. Free mint red/white candy?
Yay!

48. Belief in Santa Claus?
Yay!

49. Chocolate advent calender?
Did this one year. It was really inferior chocolate. Ugh.

50. Peeking at your gifts (or by accident)?
Ugh!

51. Making out with Santa under the mistletoe?
Depends on the Santa.

52. Decorated houses?
Yay!

53. Extreme decorated houses?
Ugh! Big ugh!

54. White Christmas morning?
Yay!

55. Searching for ornaments in the attic?
Meh. Actually we have a ridiculously organized place for them, so no searching involved.

56. Santa knowing when you’re sleeping and awake?
Very Large Ugh! I actually heard a sermon on this topic.

First Thought That Comes To Mind When You Hear…

67. Snowflake!
Crazy. It’s the flake thing.

68. Pinecones!
Snow.

69. Elves!
Hound Dog. OH, ELVES; I thought you said ELVIS. Santa.

70. Sleigh!
Jingle bells.

71. Presents!
Tree.

72. Cookies!
Yummy.

73. Misletoe!
A girl named Mary.

74. Rudolph!
Some Nazi war criminal.

75. Blizzard!
March 1888. Biggest snow storm in Albany history, also affecting NYC. Killed a bunch of people.

76. School’s Canceled!
Lucky them, but I gprobably have to go to work anyway.

77. Ice Skating!
Trying it once to woo Carol. It worked; haven’t done it since.

78. Santa’s Lap!
Uncomfortable.

79. Black Friday!
To avoid at all costs.

80. God’s Son!
We’re all God’s children.

81. Melting Snow!
Relief.

82. Lumps of Coal!
My grandmother heated with coal.

83. Nutcracker!
Tchaikovsky

84. Ho Ho Ho!
Santa Claus

85. North Pole!
Global warming and starving polar bears.

What’s a Winter Activity YOU Do…

86. …In the snow by yourself?
I try not to go out in the snow by myself. I try to stay indoors as much as possible.

87. …Inside by yourself?
Play Christmas songs.

88. …In a public place (with/alone)?
Go to the movies.

89. …With friends/family in the snow at home?
Look, I’m not going out in the snow.

90. …With friends/family inside at home?
Watch TV. Christmas episodes.

ROG

My Solstice Tradition: ASK ROGER ANYTHING!

I’m trying, really trying, to get into the spirit of the season. I’ve been checking out Polite Scott’s Advent Calendar Comic Book Cover Countdowns and Jaquandor’s Daily Dose of Christmas and Tegan’s LEGO Advent Calendar, the Tournament of Carols (Bing will definitely win) and most of all, Fred Hembeck’s The Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, Many, MANY Faces of Santa Claus!

Yet, I’m still felling the seasonal stress. Sunday, in particular, made me very…grumpy. Sunday, I was Christmas shopping. There IS a correlation, though shopping wasn’t the only frustration that day. The neck is sore, for some reason. And my left heel has a cut on it, probably from chafing while wearing some boots when it snowed a couple weeks ago. (But NOT this past weekend, as it turns out.) The one thing that did make me laugh was an e-mail from some cruise line that had the heading, ” There’s Still Time to Give the Gift of Cruising!”

So, to cheer me up, it is your opportunity to Ask Roger Anything. Anything at all; nothing is off limits. These are the exciting rules:
1. You can ask Roger anything.
2. He must answer.
3. He must stop referring to himself in the third person.
4. My answers must be true. Now it can be the truth without being the WHOLE truth, but the discerning questioner will pick up on this.

And starting on Sunday, I will answer your questions. If you want me to answer a question or three, you can leave a comment – I love comments – or you can find my e-mail on the sidebar and you can e-mail it to me.

ROG

W is for Weather

Anyone who spent time in Albany, NY in June or July 2009 would have thought it was Seattle, Washington, because it rained. A lot. And the rain was often accompanied by severe weather – lightning, thunder and/or high winds. (Incidentally, the weather in Seattle at that time was uncharacteristically HOT, cracking 100F or 38C several times.)

One day in June, I was going to ride home, but I bailed. Severe weather – torrential winds, and some of the scariest lightning and thunder I’d ever experienced – meant that I put the bike on the bus and got home. But in that 10 minute-trip, the weather subsided. I took the bike off the bus and rode the last two blocks home. Generally, I cut through a bank parking lot, and past the elementary school, when I came across – well the pictures you’re now seeing tell the story. The red brick building is the school, the more orange building, the Pine Hills branch of the Albany Public Library.)

I called the library – the tree was on its property initially, though where it ell was all school property. But I think it was the school who had cleaned up the mess – at least on their side of the fence, by morning.

I can’t help but think: the weather is SO peculiar these days. Greenland and the Maldives Are Far Apart on the Map But Connected by Rapidly Melting Glaciers and Rising Sea Levels. If you go to abcnews.com and type in Bolivia, you’ll find a story about the disappearing slopes in the Andes, where glaciers are melting at such a rate they can longer be skied in Bolivia. A recent study says a two-degree temperature rise could flood wide areas of the planet.

Yet a kerfuffle over some e-mails – did these people even READ the content? – have led certain people to the irrational conclusion that there is no global warming. Meanwhile, I was hoping for substantive breakthrough, but the climate conference in Copenhagen has generated voluntary, unenforceable goals. I think I’ll keep worrying.

My favorite weather site.

ROG

Kennedy Center Honors

As I’ve mentioned in the past, I am a sucker for the Kennedy Center Honors. This is the 32nd year, and I’ve been following them since practically the beginning. The difference is that in the early days, the performers were sometimes names I knew, though often not, and even the people I recognized, I had not really sampled their works.

This year, as last four out of the five awardees are rather familiar to me.

Writer, composer, actor, director, and producer Mel Brooks

I have always HEARD of Mel Brooks, from the early days of television, from Sid Caesar’s Your Show of Shows, which started before I was born, to creating the series Get Smart in the mid-1960s and the Robin Hood spoof When Things Were Rotten in the mid-1970s.

But it is his writing/producing/directing movies for which I know him.
The Producers (1968) -long before the musical, or the movie of the musical, there was the movie about making money by seemingly losing money. One of the funniest things I ever saw is when the audience is slackjawed after hearing “Springtime for Hitler”, which Brooks not only wrote but sang. There was a 2001 interview on 60 Minutes, which I saw at the time, where he describes his feelings about Hitler:
Hitler was part of this incredible idea that you could put Jews in concentration camps and kill them. And how do you get even? How do you get even with the man? How do you get even with him? There’s only one way to get even. You have to bring him down with ridicule. Because if you stand on a soapbox and you match him with rhetoric, you’re just as bad as he is. But if you can make people laugh at him, then you’re one up on him. And it’s been one of my lifelong jobs has been to make the
world laugh at Adolf Hitler.
That he succeeded is a great understatement.
Blazing Saddles (1974): it’s pretty funny, though it has no suitable ending.
Young Frankenstein (1974): one of the funniest films ever made. I literally fell out of my seat when I saw this in the movie theater; good thing I had an aisle seat.
Silent Movie (1976); High Anxiety (1977) – both funnier in concept than in execution
History of the World: Part I (1981) – few movies I’ve enjoyed less than this. The chief redeeming quality, and it comes near the end: Hitler on ice skates.
Other items of his I saw: My Favorite Year (1982), which he executive produced, and the TV show Mad About You in the late 1990s, where he played Uncle Phil.
Sommeday, I’ll see The Producers on stage.

Pianist and composer Dave Brubeck.

The only CD I own is Time Out (1960), but I have some Brubeck on vinyl. I know I have Time Further Out (1961), which has music in just about every time signature imaginable. I have My Favorite Things (1966). I’ve given out his greatest hits album to people who don’t know him, saying, “You need to know this guy.”
He turned 89 this month and is STILL playing on tour. I was playing Time Out earlier this month and someone visiting my house said, “What’s the name of that song?” It was Take Five. Coincidentally, my buddy Steve Bissette linked to it this month.

Opera singer Grace Bumbry

OK, here’s the hole in my wisdom. I’d heard the name, but I just don’t know opera.

Actor, director, and producer Robert De Niro

I need to go back and see some of his performances from the 1970s; actually a whole bunch of his films, now that I look at the list. But these I definitely did see:
Raging Bull (1980)
The King of Comedy (1982)
Goodfellas (1990)
Stanley & Iris (1990)
Awakenings (1990)
Cape Fear (1991)
Wag the Dog (1997)
Jackie Brown (1997)
Analyze This (1999)
Meet the Parents (2000)
But it’s his work with the Tribeca Film Festival which may be his lasting legacy.
The Tribeca Film Festival was founded in 2002 by Jane Rosenthal, Robert De Niro and Craig Hatkoff in a response to the September 11, 2001 attacks on the World Trade Center and the consequent loss of vitality in the TriBeCa neighborhood in Manhattan.

The mission of the film festival is “to enable the international film community and the general public to experience the power of film by redefining the film festival experience.” The Tribeca Film Festival was founded to celebrate New York City as a major filmmaking center and to contribute to the long-term recovery of lower Manhattan.

Singer and songwriter Bruce Springsteen.

I had this office mate around whom one was not allowed to play Bruce Springsteen music; apparently, it had to do with a broken relationship. Conversely, I had an old girlfriend who was pretty much obsessed with “the Boss.” Which reminds me of that joke on Saturday Night Live a couple weeks ago, about Obama being the President, but
Springsteen being the Boss; so Springsteen ordered all the troops home from Afghanistan.

I noted here my Springsteen discography. Add the 2009 Working On A Dream CD to that and the er, unauthorized recordings someone sent me.

Plus he shows up as songwriter/producer for many other artists’ music I own such as Gary “U.S.” Bonds and Southside Johnny & the Asbury Dukes, not to mention his rendition of Merry Christmas Baby on the very first A Very Special Christmas.

Oh, and I got to see him this year, for the very first time.

The Kennedy Center Honors medallions [were] presented on Saturday, December 5, the night before the gala, at a State Department dinner hosted by Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton…The Honors Gala will be recorded for broadcast on the CBS Network for the 32nd consecutive year as a two-hour primetime special on Tuesday, December 29 at 9:00 p.m. (ET/PT).

ROG