Roger O Green

The Lydster: Her career choices

I saved this Ask Roger Anything question, from Chris, until now:

Do you feel like you’re pushing your daughter towards certain career choices or letting her choose, or both? Do you think you’d be supportive of a career where it would be difficult for her to make a living, e.g. actress or musician?

Oh goodness, no. That’s a function of her needing to figure out what she wants to do. And honestly, I don’t have a strong sense of something I want her to do. I suppose I don’t want her to do something that involves a lot of danger.

Thinking about some of the things she has tried out:

Ballet – did it for two or three years, decided it wasn’t for her. But the lessons she learned have been useful, and she still likes to choreograph her own moves.

Soccer – she did youth soccer for three or four seasons, decided it wasn’t for her. So I was a bit surprised that she signed up for modified youth soccer this fall. What she learned before has come in handy.

Playing clarinet – her mother played, and she seemed to enjoy it. Moreover, I thought she got to be rather good at it, but she suddenly dropped it a couple of years ago. I was surprised when she pulled it out once this past summer. Maybe she’ll go back to it, maybe she won’t.

Things she’s interested in currently:

Art – she’s quite good at it, and she received some local awards for it. She DOES agonize over her work, though.

Clothing design – She’s been taking old clothes, cutting them up, stitching them together. Well not so much in the school year, but it was a business she wanted to look into this past summer.

Law – right now, she says she wants to be a lawyer. She sees injustice on the news on TV and wants to fix it. I wanted to be a lawyer for a time, so that would be fine.

One of the things that seems constant in this narrative is that everything learned has value. Maybe it won’t be applied directly, but it won’t go to waste.

Would I discourage her from a career path that might be difficult? No, and frankly, it would not have occurred to me. Now that I think of it, neither of my late parents EVER said, “you ought to do” X for a living. My father had a varied career, and I doubt it would have occurred to HIM. My mom was easygoing about those things, as long as we were happy and not involved in some criminal activity.

Music Throwback Saturday: Thank You

Back in 2010, I listed and linked to three Thank You songs for the Thanksgiving weekend. I figure if it was good enough for six years ago, it’s good enough for now. I have all songs in my collection.

Thank the Lord for the Night Time – Neil Diamond, #13 in 1967

While some of his later work I thought was too middle of the road for my tastes, I LOVED early Neil Diamond: Cherry Cherry, Kentucky Woman, Solitary Man, Holly Holy. This was far from the biggest hit for the singer/songwriter, though I wonder if it did better regionally because I heard this a lot in the day. This is probably my favorite of his songs; it is very soulful.

Listen HERE or HERE

Thank God I’m a Country Boy – John Denver, #1 on both the pop and country charts, in 1975; also #1 in Canada.

Written by John Martin Sommers, a guitar/banjo/fiddle/mandolin player in Denver’s backup band, “the song was originally included on Denver’s 1974 album Back Home Again. A version recorded live on August 26, 1974 at the Universal Amphitheatre in Los Angeles was included on his 1975 album An Evening with John Denver.”

It’s the live version that was the hit, one of four pop songs, and one of three country tuns to top the charts. This and I’m Sorry/Calypso topped both.

Listen HERE

Thank You – Boyz II Men, #21 pop, #17 soul, in 1995

The third single from Boyz II Men’s second studio album, II, this new jack swing song was co-written and co-produced by Dallas Austin and the group. It is almost certainly my favorite song by the quartet, now operating as a trio.

The group had three hits that hit #1 for weeks in double digits on the pop charts: End Of the Road (13 in 1992), I’ll Make Love To You (14 in 1994) and, with Mariah Carey, One Sweet Day (16 in 1995), which was the second question on the first JEOPARDY! game I played.

LISTEN HERE (single version) or HERE (a capella album cut)

Pizza and compassion, to go

On this Thanksgiving day, I’m thankful.

It was a Monday in late September when I was coming from a meeting, and heading to church. This guy named “Tim” was looking for something to eat.

Being very close to a pizza shop on Lark Street in Albany, I asked him to come in and order a slice or two. While we were waiting, Tim told me what a screw-up he had been.

He’s fallen off the sobriety wagon, again, and he’s embarrassed that his brother will be coming to town to go to some rock concert. Tim knows his brother will be disappointed.

I had no words of wisdom. I told him that I thought he was being terribly hard on himself, that he should keep on trying.

As I packed up my pizza slice to go – I WAS already running late by then – Tim gave me a big hug. And I’ll tell you the truth: I wasn’t fond of Tim hugging me with his boozy breath and slightly malodorous self.

But what I remembered from a very different story informed me: Tim needed to hug ME, Tim needed to thank ME.

So, on this Thanksgiving day, I’m thankful. Thankful that I don’t have Tim’s addiction. Thankful that I had the means to buy him dinner. Thankful that I can try to see the situation from Tim’s point of view.

It’s hard for us to be inclusive, to embrace those who are different. We may be OK with gay people or black people, but waiting the extra time it takes for a person in a wheelchair to board the bus may make us cranky. I suspect there are areas we all have that push against our blinders.

May we all be thankful, and ask for greater awareness and compassion for those around us, especially those we might find different or “lesser.”

Also: John Green: On Not Seeing Hamilton

Eight Poets to Discuss Over the Thanksgiving Table

The Muppets auditioning for the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade

Cousin Donald Yates (1943-2016)

Donald Yates was my late mother’s first cousin. As I explained when his brother Robert died last year, they, their late older brother Raymond (d. 1978), and their older sister Frances were my mother’s closest relatives, though Raymond, the oldest, was a decade and a day younger than Mom.

They lived in Binghamton until their dad Ernie died suddenly in 1954, when Charlotte and the kids moved to St. Albans, Queens in New York City. The Greens would go down and the Yates would come up at least annually. Their kids, including Don’s’s kids Donnie and Tanya, were the closest relatives my siblings and I had, even though they were a decade or more younger than us.

My late father arranged the flowers for Donald’s wedding to his first wife, Carole – who I saw at the funeral – as he did for Robert and Audrey back in the 1960s.

I’d see Don only occasionally in the past couple of decades, always with Robert, but they would always be memorable. My wedding in 1999, the birth of my child in 2004, a few mini-family gatherings in Binghamton (one definitely in 2006), and Thanksgiving 2013 at the home of their niece Anne outside New York City. They were always generous with their resources – my wife specifically recalls their generous monetary gift after the Daughter was born.

The last time I saw Donald was at his brother Robert’s funeral. My trek to Donald’s funeral was nearly a carbon copy – early train to NYC, the E subway out to Queens, then local bus (Q4) to the funeral home where I spoke, open casket, the trek to the cemetery in Long Island, trip back to Jamaica, Queens for a 2 p.m. repast that was closer to 3 p.m., and a train back north. The repetition does NOT make it easier.

There WAS one significant difference, though. At the cemetery with Robert, there was just the ceremonial burying. At this service, there was a drape covering a pile of dirt, and after we all flung flowers on the casket, it was lowered, and a backhoe that was nearby was driven over to the gravesite and filled the hole with dirt. I had heard of such things, but I had never actually seen it happen in the dozens of burials I’ve attended.

T is for TV opening themes

When I saw that Chuck Miller listed ten iconic TV opening themes, I knew I had to do likewise. I LOVE opening TV themes; I have SEVEN CDs with 65 themes each, plus some soundtracks. And I’ve obsessed on the topic before.

This list features those themes without words, mostly because the roster became SO long, I had to split it up.

20. I Love Lucy- H. Adamson/E. Daniel. A staple of my childhood.
Listen here or here Listen also to the song sung by Desi Arnaz

19. The Office (U.S.) – Jay Ferguson. A jaunty tune which ends up rocking out
Listen here or here, long version by The Scrantones
The show almost had a different theme.

18. The Dick Van Dyke Show – music by Earle Hagen. Possibly my favorite TV show of all time.
Listen here or here. Dick Van Dyke sings the theme with friends; lyrics by Morey Amsterdam (Buddy Sorrell on the show)

17. The Rockford Files – Pete Carpenter and Mike Post. Mike Post will show up again on this list.
Listen here or here

16. Bonanza – Jay Livingston and Ray Evans, featuring orchestration by David Rose
Back when we still had a black and white TV, we ‘d go over to my grandma’s next-door neighbor’s house to watch that burning Ponderosa map in color
Listen here or here or here (12 different versions)

15. Get Smart – Irving Szathmary
That clever spy spoof created by Mel Brooks with Buck Henry.
Listen here or here

14. The Simpsons – Danny Elfman
It’s a flexible form. I have a Simpsons soundtrack and the theme is wonderfully manipulated.
Listen here or here

13. The Fugitive – Peter Rugolo
My mother’s favorite show, maybe because she had a crush on David Janssen.
Listen here or here, including musical themes and cues

12. Miami Vice – Jan Hammer
The extended version went to #1 on the pop charts in 1985.
Listen here or here, extended

11. Night Court – Jack Elliot
Listen here or here (intro and outro)

10. Peter Gunn – Henry Mancini
I barely remember the show, but the song must have gotten radio play.
Listen here or here (different iteration)

9. Sanford & Son – Quincy Jones
Called The Streetbeater
Listen here or here (long version)

8. The Andy Griffith Show – Earle Hagen, Herbert Spencer and Everett Sloane
Called The Fishin’ Hole. It’s hard to whistle in tune, especially in harmony.
Listen here or here (opening & closing)

7. Barney Miller – Jack Elliott & Allyn Ferguson
It was actually the theme that got me to watch the comedy cop show.
Listen here or here

6. MAS*H by Johnny Mandel
“Suicide Is Painless” was used in the movie
Listen here or here

5. Hawaii Five-O – Morton Stevens
The extended version by the Ventures got to #4 in 1969
Listen here or here (long)

4. Mission: Impossible – Lalo Schifrin
A show I watched religiously with my dad.
Listen here or here

3. Hill Street Blues – Mike Post
Possibly my favorite show of the 1980s.
Listen here or here (extended)

2. Law & Order – Mike Post
I have an LP of Mike Post-composed themes
Listen here or here (extended)

1. Perry Mason – Fred Steiner
I think it’s the closing theme, an extension of the opening, that makes me love this song.
Listen here or here or here (closing)

There are a couple of instrumentals that belong on the list, but I can’t divorce the voiceover from the music

* The Twilight Zone – Marius Constant
The Rod Serling narration I find intertwined.
Listen here or here or here (all instrumental). Also,
Bernard Hermann music, from season 1

* Star Trek – Alexander Courage
Theme from Star Trek” (originally scored under the title “Where No Man Has Gone Before”) I always hear with William Shatner’s voice
Listen here or here