40 Years After: May 1971

She apologized but said she had started seeing someone else, so she had to break up with me.

Here’s a new thing I’m doing on this blog: a periodic recollection of my freshman year, into the beginning of my sophomore year, of college. These were significant events that had medium-to-long-term consequences in my life. If I had the discipline, it’d be an essay or one way-too-long blogpost.

I won’t be writing them even every month, but in September of this year, then in February, May, June, August, and October of next year; maybe a couple of other times. I’ll probably link back to the previous episodes, but I’m not going to write the whole thing then chop it up. But the background from the previous segments should inform the subsequent pieces if I do it write, or right.

I went to college where I did because my girlfriend was already there. But that didn’t exactly work out as I planned.

In the fall of 1970, I was in the second half of my senior year at Binghamton (NY) Central High School, and I would be graduating in January 1971. Meanwhile, my girlfriend, who was six months older than I, was a freshman at the State University of New York at New Paltz, about 150 miles away, in a small town along the Hudson River about halfway between New York City and Albany.

I would visit her at the all-female Bliss Hall when I could, which was difficult because there was no direct bus there. There was no train, and I would have had to take two buses, through New York City or through Albany, to get there by that mode.

The easiest way was to hitchhike. But this not to say it was simple. I had to go from Route 17, an interstate-type road to these series of local roads (52, 209, 44/55, and finally 299) to New Paltz.

I visited her once or twice in the fall and saw her at Christmastime, and perhaps once in the winter.

Then I got a job working at IBM in March 1971. It was allegedly 40 hours a week, from 5:12 p.m. to 2 a.m., with a 48-minute lunch break, but business was good, and I generally worked a 56-hour workweek, i.e., 5:12 p.m. to 4 a.m., then Saturday from noon to 6 p.m. As a result, I was very tired but too tired to spend any money, and I socked away enough for my first year in college by the time I quit in August.

One weekend in May, I must have had a rare Saturday off, so I decided to surprise the girlfriend by hitching out to New Paltz. I got to Bliss Hall, and her hall neighbors said that she wasn’t there. But I had met them a couple of times and they seemed a little weird.

Finally, the girlfriend shows up. She apologized but said she had started seeing someone else, so she had to break up with me. Needless to say, I was devastated, and left. I contacted my friend Steve, who was across the river in Poughkeepsie, hitched over there (or maybe she gave me a ride; I’m not sure), and he commiserated with me. I specifically remember him going on and on about this great singer/guitarist named Bonnie Raitt, who I had never heard of, but who he had seen perform in the area; her debut album would come out later that year.

Then I hitched home.

Did I mention that New Paltz, where I had been accepted, was the ONLY college I applied to? So I’ll be going away to this particular college in the fall for, as it turned out, no particular reason.

 

Presbyterian Church allows gay ordination

The votes reflect a shift in attitudes within the church, and within American society, as public attitudes against homosexuality have softened.


I knew that the vote was coming, but I didn’t know what the outcome until I saw the news stories about the Presbyterian church allowing gays to serve as ministers and lay leaders:

“A debate that has raged within the Presbyterian Church for more than three decades culminated Tuesday with ratification of a measure allowing the ordination of gay and lesbian ministers and lay leaders, while giving regional church bodies the ability to decide for themselves.

“With the vote of its regional organization in Minnesota, the Presbyterian Church USA became the fourth mainline Protestant church to allow gay ordination, following the Episcopal and Evangelical Lutheran churches and the United Church of Christ.”

The MSNBC story actually gave the best description I saw of the process: “The change to the Presbyterian Church constitution was approved last summer by the church’s General Assembly, its governing body. But under church rules, such changes must then be ratified by a majority of the 173 regional organizations known as presbyteries.

“Late Tuesday, at a meeting in St. Louis Park, a Minneapolis suburb, the Twin Cities Presbytery put the measure over the top with a vote of 205 to 56, becoming the 87th regional body to vote yes. About 90 minutes later, the Pacific Presbytery, representing parts of Southern California and all of Hawaii, added its voice, voting 102 to 60 in favor.

“It was the fourth time the church had voted on issues related to gay ordination, and the votes reflect a shift in attitudes within the church, and within American society, as public attitudes against homosexuality have softened. Since the last time the matter was brought to a vote, in 2008-09, some 19 presbyteries have switched their votes from ‘no’ to ‘yes,’ including some in relatively conservative parts of the country, such as central Nebraska and northern Alabama.”

The More Light Presbyterians, who have been working “for the full participation of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people of faith in the life, ministry and witness of the Presbyterian Church (USA),” explain the specific language.

I’m happy about the vote, but also relieved. Truth is that there have been a number of gay Presbyterian elders and deacons across the country. They or their congregations had been in technical violation of church polity and theoretically could have been brought up on charges, as has happened to some pastors in various Protestant denominations, though it would be unlikely to actually take place in the Presbyterian church without some additional issues involved.

Actually, I suppose it was more the theological disconnect, such as the Catholic church’s teachings on contraception versus poll after poll noting that about 70% of the church ignores the policy.

Here’s an article on this topic from 365gay.com
***
A National Hockey League player for marriage equality.

The New Dishwasher

I was REALLY BAD at health, and the cleanliness of the fingernails was largely what we were graded on.


Our previous dishwasher, which was only about eight years old, stopped working last month for no particular reason. So my wife has ordered a new machine. Meanwhile, the dishwasher, primarily, is me.

Initially, this bugged me somewhat. It was just one more thing in an already busy day. But as I thought about it, it really wasn’t taking more time than the machine. After all, we’d load the washer and then almost all of the items on the lower level would get clean, but only about half of the things on the top, so someone -usually me – had to rewash them anyway.

Besides, I rather like washing dishes. Maybe it’s the Pisces in me that loves the warm water.

And as I was cleaning them this past weekend, I flashed back to my childhood, when washing the dishes was my primary household task besides cleaning my room. I was, even then, very good at it. And it had other values.

Back in fourth grade, our teacher used to check our fingernails to see if they were clean; even then, I thought this was bizarre. Mine usually were untidy from playing in the dirt. And she would send reports home along with our grades; I was REALLY BAD at health, and the cleanliness of the fingernails was largely what we were graded on. BUT if I had the chance to wash the breakfast dishes, then my fingernails would be satisfactory.

Come check my nails; they are REALLY clean these days.

Q is for Queens

“Five monarchies in Europe have eliminated male preference: Sweden, Norway, Netherlands, Belgium and Denmark.”


The last couple of times for Q, I did Queen, the rock group, and Queens, the NYC county. Obviously, I’m stuck in a rut, because I’m doing queens again, this time referring to the monarchy.

Of course, there have been woman rulers for a long time, whether dubbed queen, czarina, or other titles.

I suppose I should differentiate between someone named as queen, wife (sometimes consort) of the king, and someone who serves as monarch. For instance, in Jordan, when American-born Lisa Halaby married King Hussein, she became Queen Noor when she converted to Islam. But when Hussein died in 1999, and his son by a previous marriage became King Abdullah II, Abdullah’s wife became Queen Rania, with Noor becoming queen dowager.

As far as I can tell – and please correct me if I’m wrong – there are only three current queen monarchs: Queen Margrethe II of Denmark (pictured above), Queen Beatrix of the Netherlands (pictured to the right), and the one who just turned 85.

The rules of male primogeniture had been in place for many years in most countries, which meant that the only way a female could become a monarch queen is if her father had no sons whatsoever. This is, of course, the case for the world’s best-known current female monarch, Queen Elizabeth II, whose father George VI had two daughters, she and Margaret, and no sons.

The rules of primogeniture, though are changing. “Five monarchies in Europe have eliminated male preference: Sweden, Norway, Netherlands, Belgium, and Denmark.” However, the Norwegian change is not retroactive and therefore does not affect the current succession where a younger male is ranked over an older female.

Spain and the United Kingdom are also considering the change; however, for the latter, this would require changes in the law in not only the UK, but the 15 other Commonwealth realm countries of Antigua and Barbuda, Australia, the Bahamas, Barbados, Belize, Canada, Grenada, Jamaica, New Zealand, Papua New Guinea, Saint Kitts and Nevis, Saint Lucia, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, the Solomon Islands, and Tuvalu.

ABC Wednesday – Round 8

5000 Questions, Part 2

World Almanac. And a porta-potty.


26. Who has done something today to show they care about you?

Co-workers, folks on the bus, family.

27. Do you have a lot to learn?

Oh yeah. And then there’s the relearning of stuff I should have known.

28. If you could learn how to do three things just by wishing and not by working what would they be?

A How to speak many languages

B How to fly a plane

C How to play the piano

29. Which do you remember the longest: what other people say, what other people do or how other people make you feel?

Feel.

30. What are the key ingredients to having a good relationship?

Honesty, intentionality, communications, sensitivity.

31. What 3 things do you want to do before you die?

A Meet a US President

B Go to all 50 of the United States – 20 to go

C Go to a World Series game or the Super Bowl

32. What three things would you want to die to avoid doing?

Causing others extreme pain – stuff like that.

33. Is there a cause you believe in more than any other cause?

Justice.

34. What does each decade make you think of:

The 19…

20s: Illegal booze, Teapot Dome

30s: Depression, New Deal, the rise of Hitler

40s: WWII, A-bombs, desegregation of US military

50s: Montgomery bus boycott, Korean war, Brown v. Board of Education, red scare, Sputnik

60s: Beatles, Motown, Aretha, Beach Boys, JFK & MLK & RFK assassinations, Twilight Zone, some great Supreme Court rulings such as Loving v. Virginia

70s: College, bicentennial, punk rock

80s: Hair bands, Reagan, “Born in the USA”, “Thriller”

90s: Library school, the trips to Detroit, Cleveland, DC, Barbados, JEOPARDY!

2000s: Homeownership, the daughter

2010s (so far): Blogging

35. Which decade do you feel the most special connection to and why?

The 1960s…that time period, especially 1968, really began to define me as a person.

36. What is your favorite oldie/classic rock song?
Impossible question. Pick one at random from what I recently listened to: Since You’ve Been Gone (Sweet Sweet Baby) by Aretha

37. What country do you live in and who is the leader of that country?

US, Obama

If you could say any sentence to the current leader of your country what would it be?

Overpromising and underdelivering is a tough strategy to accept.

38. What’s your favorite TV channel to watch in the middle of the night?

Though I’d probably just watch DVRed stuff, sometimes I wind up watching various permutations of Law & Order or ESPN Sportcenter, neither of which do I watch otherwise.

39. What Disney villain are you the most like and why?

Gaston from Beauty and the Beast. A bit of ego.

40. Have you ever been a girl scout/boy scout?

I was in Cub Scouts, but it didn’t hold my interest. And I wasn’t very good at it.

41. If you were traveling to another continent would you rather fly or take a boat?

I’d rather travel by boat, depending on available time.

42. Why is the sky blue during the day and black at night?

Sunlight.

43. What does your name mean?

It’s a color. Oh, the OTHER name – Spear bearer.

44. Would you rather explore the deeps of the ocean or outer space?

Outer space.

45. Word association

What is the first word that comes to mind when you see the word:

Air: Breathe

Meat: Puppets

Different: Strokes

Pink: Floyd

Deserve: Star

White: Stripes

Elvis: Costello

Magic: Johnson

Heart: Damn Yankees

Clash: Strummer

Pulp: Trees

46. If you could meet any person in the world who is dead who would you want it to be?

This week, Jackie Robinson.

47. What if you could meet anyone who is alive?

US Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont.

48. Is there a movie that you love so much you could watch it every day?

I doubt there is such a movie.

49. You are going to be stuck alone in an elevator for a week. What do you bring to do?

World Almanac. And a porta-potty.

50. Have you ever saved someone’s life or had your life saved?

Yes, and possibly.

 

Ramblin' with Roger
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