wedding Archives - Ramblin' with Roger

Rent a car in western France et al.

SNCF

My friend Deborah negotiated to rent a car in western France for us, including me emailing my wife’s driver’s license so she could show the dealer. I tried to secure the vehicle myself, but the webpage was terrible. Among other things, it kept slipping back to French, even though it had an English-language option.

Finding a vehicle with an automatic transmission was a challenge. Also, it was fairly expensive compared with US rates.

The downpayment for the trip we gave to AAA to give to Avanti was paid on January 21. I guess we’re really doing this. We booked another hotel for the night after the wedding, and all the accommodations were set.

My wife in the US had never met my friend Deborah. One of the lovely things about technology is that they got to at least see each other on Facebook. They seem to hit it off.

The train

The one unsettled element involves buying train tickets. We’ve discovered that Avanti won’t order them until they have our valid passports.

Our passports expired in August 2020. We didn’t rush to get them renewed since we weren’t planning to go anywhere during COVID. I decided to get mine and received it in March of 2022.

My wife mailed her application on January 8, 2023, which was supposed to arrive at the processor on January 10. (We found out later that it wasn’t delivered until January 17.)

On February 5, Deborah frantically called my cell phone. We were waiting in line at an Indian food buffet. For reasons I didn’t understand, everyone within range of me could hear her, and I didn’t know how to fix it.

She checked with the train service and adjudged that there would be NO train tickets if we did not buy them immediately. The next day, she wrote: “Big problem. I went to the train station today to find out why there are no trains showing for the 18th from Paris to Auray and no trains showing for the 20th from Auray to Paris, and it seems…the SNCF has cancelled all trains for those days to do work on the tracks. Right during the four-day holiday weekend, the Semaine du Golfe, etc.”

Technology

I attempted to navigate the website The Société nationale des chemins de fer français is France’s national state-owned railway company. But I was having a terrible time. I was on the site for 45 minutes, and as it kept switching back and forth from English to French, I was quite literally getting a headache.

Ultimately, Deborah bought us tickets. I gave her my credit card number, but it didn’t work. I sent her 375 Euros via PayPal, which was $422 US.

On March 20, my wife’s passport finally arrived, and I emailed the vital info to AAA. I wrote on April 5 to AAA: “Do we have train tickets?” They wrote back, but neither my wife nor I received it. Finally, on April 12, it was confirmed: train tickets to Auray and then back to Paris.

Deborah worked on getting me a refund for the tickets she bought, complicated by the wonky technology on the part of the SNCF website, which is totally believable.

Unrest

I could not have foreseen protests over French legislation that would increase the pension age to 64 from 62. President Macron said the measures are needed “to keep France internationally competitive amid declining fertility and an aging population.” The pushback started in January but intensified in March.

Alan Singer wrote in March: Macron “used a Parliamentary tactic to avoid an up or down vote on raising the retirement age.” He survived a vote of no confidence, which would have scuttled the bill and forced Macron’s cabinet, but not the French President, to resign.

More protests took place on May Day. “The pension overhaul was approved by the country’s Constitutional Council and officially signed into law, so while Mr. Macron will not find the issue easy to leave behind, there is little chance the protesters will be able to persuade him to reverse his decision.”

Talk about great timing.

Deborah and Cyrille are engaged!

Gulf of Morbihan

My friend Deborah wrote to me in October 2022 that she and her beau Cyrille are engaged! I was happy for her and also a bit surprised for reasons.

Did I want to come to the wedding? Well, sure, of course. The slightly complicating factor is that they live in the Brittany section of France.

I’ve never been to France, or, for that matter, anywhere that’s not in North America. I always wanted to, and now’s an excellent opportunity.

Still, after they sent out the electronic, animated invitations on December 4, I did not respond despite indicating my desire to attend in an email. The wedding is a very elaborate series of events, which will be described in due course. On December 11, Deborah asked about my wife and me attending since I had not RSVPed yet.

This involved the next issue. After six months off, my wife would start a new job on January 2, 2023. It involves an afterschool program, and the school year is still going on May 19, when the wedding occurs.

(I should note that the six months “off” included her falling on her face, getting COVID, and having a leg infection that sent her to the hospital for four days plus more treatments for a month and a half afterward.)

I wrote, “I am going. [My wife] says she wants to go too but has to negotiate. She also needs to apply for her passport. I will let you know by the end of the month.”

Oui

We said yes on December 19, the same day we went to the local AAA office to discuss the trip with a travel consultant. They wrote back two days later: “Attached is a quote for your trip to France. Unfortunately, Avanti did not have any hotels in Erdeven. I checked, and none of the suppliers that we work with have hotels there. The closest town would be Auray (where the train goes) or Carnac.”

The trip involved flying from JFK Airport at 1830 on May 14, arriving at Charles De Gaulle Airport on May 15, staying at a hotel in Paris for three nights, then taking a train to Auray.

On January 4, we received another message from the couple, marked URGENT. “We are happy that you are coming.

“But we have learned that our wedding is during a major Brittany event, La Semaine du Golfe… It is urgent to make your hotel and transport reservations as soon as possible.”

Re: that event, taking place from Monday, May 15th to Sunday, May 21st, 2023.: “The Gulf of Morbihan regularly welcomes over 1000 classic and traditional vessels for La Semaine du Golfe, a quite unique maritime festival sees the fleet split into flotillas by class, with around 18 harbours welcoming a new flotilla on each day on the event.”

Deborah and Cyrille wrote: “We also want to invite you to a post-wedding brunch at our home on Saturday, 20th of May, at 12:30 pm at our home. Please RSVP by 15 January.” This we did.

Ascension Day

Next complication. We need to rent a car to get around to the various wedding locales. Avis in Auray, both at the train station and downtown, close at noon on the 17th, and they are closed all day on Thursday the 18th for Ascension Day.

What the heck is Ascension Day? “We commemorate Jesus Christ’s ascension into heaven (as per Christian belief) by celebrating Ascension Day, which occurs on the Thursday, which is 40 (or 39) days after Easter. This year, it will take place on May 18. Known by multiple names — The Feast of the Ascension, The Ascension of Jesus, Ascension Thursday, Holy Thursday, or Solemnity of the Ascension of the Lord — this is a Christian holiday that doubles as a public holiday in many countries like Austria, Belgium, Denmark, Germany, France, and more.”

This took me by surprise. The Wikipedia list of countries puts France as the 17th least devout among 144 counties, with only three in ten people saying that religion is important. (In the US, two in three say religion is important.)

So we returned to AAA on the phone and changed the train from the 18th to the 17th. Also, we booked a place to stay in Auray on the 17th and the 18th. But we did not yet undo our three days in Paris because AAA couldn’t get Avanti to lock in the train tickets.

But that’s for the next installment.

Meeting my wife; hometown hangouts

Spring Forest Cemetery

Amy is looking forward to hearing my replies to two questions:

Where did you meet your wife? Always wanted to ask that one!

Meeting my wife was not that interesting a story, actually. Now getting back together…

I was going to my former church, the Methodist one, and sang in the choir. I was also chair, at different times, of the Administrative Board and chair of the Council on Ministries, which essentially provided for “planning and implementing a program of nurture, outreach, witness, and resources in the local church.”

When I was COM chair, I recruited her (I think) to be chair of the Membership Committee, even though she was a fairly new member herself. So when my previous relationship went south, we went out for about a year and a half. Then we broke up, for good and understandable reasons.

But we were still friends, even though we went out with other people. I even attended an intense 34-week Bible study called Disciple at her house in 1996-97. that was the last time I read the Bible all the way through, BTW.

It was a strange time. I was in her brother’s wedding in September 1996. Eventually, around August 1998, I decided that we should get back together, though she was apparently unaware of this until October 1998, when I kissed her; I think we were at Five Rivers.

Apparently, she had sought the opinions of her family that she should get back with me. And right after my win on JEOPARDY, we did. And since we were, er, older, we got married six months later, with her late brother John, who had always been a Fan of Roger, in the wedding party.

In my hometown

Also, what were your favorite places to go to in Binghamton when you were a kid?

Spring Forest Cemetery was very close to my grandma Williams’ house and only a block from my K-9 school. Sometimes, we would go sledding there, on the roads, not near the headstones, thank you.

And cutting through the cemetery was the shortest way to Ansco field, where we played baseball. I loved baseball, but I wasn’t that good at it. I didn’t even get to be almost competent until I was in college. As I mentioned, Valley Street Park and miniature golf were very near my home.

Movies! I went mostly to the Ritz on Clinton Street, and the Strand and Riviera on Chenango Street, very close to where my mom worked, at McLean’s department store. Occasionally, the Crest on Main Street. BTW, these are all defunct.

A song you’d love played at your wedding

I will catch your fall

The next music prompt is “A song you’d love be played at your wedding.” I assume they’re really talking about the reception – among other things, we had Bach during the ceremony – so I’m operating on that premise.

We had a keyboard player that played a number of songs. I believe my father, sister and niece Rebecca likely sang; I might have as well, but it’s a bit a blur. I specifically recall, because there’s a photo, my niece Alex singing Yellow Submarine with one of her young cousins.

My wife and I first-danced to At Last by Etta James. I’m sure the first time I owned it was from the Rain Man soundtrack. I know the choice is now cliched. But we went out for 18 months (1994-1996), broke up, then got together at the end of 1998 and married in May 1999.

When I was wooing her again, I made her a mixed tape. Such a quaint device. I no longer have any idea what put on that collection. Knowing me, it probably had God Only Knows by the Beach Boys.

She only remembers one song, I believe, and that is Have A Little Faith in Me by John Hiatt, my favorite song by him.
And when your back’s against the wall
Just turn around and you will see
I will catch, I will catch your fall baby
Just have a little faith in me

What else might I have put on? I Only Have Eyes for You by the Flamingoes is highly probable.

The rest is speculation. How about Betcha By Golly Wow, maybe by Aaron Neville rather than the Stylistics, because I didn’t have the latter on CD.

Finally, a song I doubt I put on, but would now: Let’s Make More Love by Nat King Cole, from the Billy May Sessions, released in 1993. Oddly, the composer is listed as Unknown.

Hey, 19, it’s anniversary

When she goes out, she sometimes says “Don’t miss me too much.”

From https://www.etsy.com/listing/502738012/19th-anniversary-coffee-mug-6935-days

Like all good marriages, after 19 years, my wife and I have developed a division of labor. I know all the Cabinet secretaries in this administration, difficult because they’re so changeable. She knows what’s in our office secretary, amazing because I can’t find a damn thing.

I know all of the birthdays of the Beatles. She knows how much the mortgage payment is each month. (To be fair to me, the payment is made automatically from our bank account.)

I’m sure that I have inspired her interest in the areas of being aware of the news, of progressive causes, and the issue of inequity. She has pushed me to be more fiscally responsible; for good and ill, I wouldn’t own a house without her.

When went to see our investment adviser in 2017, she was excited and fascinated. Meanwhile, my eyed almost literally glazed over. But she helped point out that we were better off financially long term than I realized, hard to see when the day-to-day bills arrive.

This Blondie strip about housekeeping is absolutely true of her.

Sometimes, we get into that groove where one of us is talking and misspeaks, but the other one says, “Oh, I know what you mean.” This saves an inordinate amount of time.

We very seldom fight. I don’t know if that is a good thing or bad thing, but it is our modus operandi.

I see her family far more than I see mine. My nearest sister and niece are a thousand miles away and my parent are deceased. Meanwhile, her parents, a brother, sister-in-law and two nieces are less than 75 minutes from us. I used to be jealous, I suppose, but now I appreciate the comfort of the love from the in-laws, who are, to a person, generous of spirit.

I haven’t done the math precisely, but, at 19 years, I think we’ve been married longer than the length of time I went out with everyone else I ever dated, combined. Hmm.

When she goes out, she sometimes says “Don’t miss me too much.” I won’t as long as she come back.