Roger O Green

Another Monday meme or three

In all likelihood, from some guy in Buffalo who wants you to Ask Him Anything.

Quiz the First
List your favorite product(s) for each of the following categories. You can also expand on why you like them, how long you’ve used them, etc.

1) Laundry detergent: Tide. That’s what my wife buys. A lot when it’s on sale. When I was single: whatever was cheapest that week.
2) Fabric softener: Febreze, I think.
3) Floor cleaner: Pine-sol or something like it, but most of them time, just sweeping, vacuuming, and Swiffers.
4) Carpet cleaner: Vacuum.
5) Glass cleaner: The store brand.
6) Dish detergent: Dawn, or some other name brand on sale. The sore brands don’t cut it for my wife. She may be right.
7) Bathroom cleaner: Whatever’s on sale.
8) Bath soap: SoftSoap shower gels.
9) Shampoo: Suave.
10) Conditioner: Same.
11) Styling products: None for me.
12) Deodorant: My mother used to sell Avon, and I have a stockpile of whatever their roll-on is.
13) Toothpaste: Crest or Colgate, on sale.
14) Mouthwash: Store brand that looks looks like Scope.
15) Face cleanser: None; use soap.
16) Moisturizer: Nope.
17) Treatment: I don’t even know what “Treatment” is!
18) Lip balm: Rarely.
19) Nail polish: None.
20) Make up: No.

Do you have a dishwasher?
Yes.

Is your living room carpeted or does it have hardwood floors?
Every room is carpeted except the kitchen and bathrooms.

Do you keep your kitchen knives on the counter or in a drawer?
We have a set in a knife block.

House, apartment, duplex or trailer?
House.

How many bedrooms is it?
The assessment says three (or four). One’s very small. One’s the office.

Gas stove or electric?
Gas. Electric, which I have had in the past, is uncivilized.

Do you have a yard?
Yes.

What size TV is in the living room?
Nineteen inches. Bought in 1987. No V-chip, no SAP, no stereo. We’ll keep it until it dies.

Are your plates in the same cupboard as your cups?
Some.

Is there a coffee maker sitting on your kitchen counter?
No. Neither my wife or I drink coffee much. We DO have a coffeemaker, for guests.

What room is your computer in?
The office, one of the “bedrooms”.

Are there pictures hanging in your living room?

Yes: a bucolic scene. A history of the British empire from 973 to 1973 that lists all of the houses and all the kings and queens in that house.

Are there any themes found in your home?
Yes. the books are in the office. The CDs are in 4 CD holders. Not a theme? I really don’t know what that means.

Do you have any curtains in your home?
We used to. The ones we had originally were custom fitted to those windows. Now we have blinds.

What color is your fridge?
That off-white “appliance” color. The freezer door is off kilter, and sometimes you have to lift it up to make sure it’s closed. This happened when I was in the refrigerator and someone opened the freezer door above me, a visiting sister, I think. I stood up and practically took the door off with my shoulders and back. The fridge is only four or five years old, and was less than one year old when this happened.

Is your house clean?

My house is clean on Saturday. Isn’t always tidy during the week, though.

What room is the most neglected?

Now that my wife has cleaned the office, mostly of her school clutter, I’d say our bedroom.

Are the dishes in your sink/dishwasher clean or dirty?
Generally clean.

How long have you lived in your home?
Since May 2000.

Where did you live before?
In the first floor of the two-family apartment Carol bought in 1992. we were there for a year, and it was way too crowded. More to the point, it was HER house, as much as she tried to make it ours. This was actually good advice my former pastor gave us before we were married; get a place that was “ours”.

Do you have one of those fluffy toilet lid covers on your toilet?
No. Never saw the point of those.

Do you have a scale anywhere in your house?
Yes, under our bed.

How many mirrors are in your house?
Two vanity mirrors in the bathroom, one other upstairs, one downstairs. Four.

Look up. What do you see?
A light fixture.

Do you have a garage?
No. We have street parking, with alternate-side parking twice a week, and a city that’ll plow you into your parking space.

Quiz the Second

1. How old will you turn in 2008?
55, double nickel.

2. Do you think you’ll be married by then?
If she’s keep me.

3. What do you look forward to most in the next 3 months?
More sleep.

4. Do you like to say “I told you so?”
No. I prefer people recognizing the rightness of my position without me saying a word.

5. Who was the last person to call you?
My wife.

6. Do you prefer call or text?
I don’t text.

7. Do you have any pets?
A stuffed cat.

8. What were you doing at 1:30 am?
Thinking about tomorrow.

9. What were you doing at 3:00 am?
Writing this.

10. When is the last time you saw your mom?
November, when I went to Charlotte, NC for her 80th birthday.

11. What is your mood?
Changeable.

12. How many houses have you lived in?
I lost count. More than 30.

13. How many city/towns have you lived in?
Binghamton, Kingston, New Paltz, Jamaica (Queens), Schenectady, and Albany, NY. Charlotte, NC.

14. Do you prefer shoes, socks or bare feet?
Slippers. Or sandals.

15. Are you a social person?
Depends.

16. What was the last thing you ate?
Graham crackers.

17. What’s your favorite color?
Blue.

18. What are you doing for your next birthday?
Taking the day off.

19. What is your favorite TV show?
It depends on the last thing I saw. There was a great Aliens in America Christmas show. That said, The Office. Or Scrubs.

20. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?
I don’t like peanut butter. when I was 3 or 4, I ate it a LOT, apparently, and now the smell/taste makes me slightly nauseous. In any case, the daughter is allergic to it, so there’s none in the house. My wife, BTW, LOVES peanut butter. Oh, jelly? Strawberry jam.

21. Do you like coffee?
No. I know this disappoints GayProf greatly, but what can you do?

22. What are you listening to?
The computer.

23. Do you have an iPod?
Yes, but don’t use it much.

24. How do you feel about the last person you kissed?
This is a family blog.

25. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
On the left, as you’re reclining on the bed with the headboard at your head.

26. Do you know how to play poker?
Yes, but I play so infrequently always need a cheat card to emind me whether a straight beats a flush or vice versa.

27. What are you thinking about right now?
Work.

28. Any plans for this weekend?
Reading, writing.

29. Have you cut your hair this week?
No. A couple weeks ago.

30. Last picture you took?
Probably of the daughter.

31. Are you a tease?
Used to be.

32. Have you ever been in an ambulance?
Once, after a car accident in Endicott, NY when I was 19.

33. Do you prefer an ocean or pool?
To swim in? A pool. To walk beside? An ocean.

34. Do you smile often?
I guess so.

35. What color are your bed sheets?
Without looking, i couldn’t tell you. Blue? Yellow? White? The red ones?

36. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
Music.

37. Do you wear any jewelry 24/7?
Wedding ring.

38. Have you heard a rumor about yourself this week?
Only the ones I’ve started.

39. Who is the funniest person you know?
Probably one of the racquetball guys.

41. Where do you want to go to college?
SUNY New Paltz (B/A.), UAlbany (M.L.S.)

42. Who was the last person to make you cry?
Probably my daughter.

43. Do you shut off the water while you brush your teeth?
Yes.

44. Do you wish you were with someone right now?
I’m good.

45. Are you mad about anything?
The “debates” that seem to seek out the salacious rather than inform, and gave more time to the top-tier candidates. NYS arcane election laws, making it harder to vote than elsewhere, spineless Democrats in Congress. And I won’t even get into the administration in DC.

Quiz the third

1. Have you ever had mono?
No.

2. The last place you were (besides now)?
Bed.

3. The last gift you received?
Music of some sort.

4. How many times a day do you drop your mobile phone?
I’ve never dropped it yet. Forget it, yes.

5. The top three things you spend the most money on?
Well, since so much of it is automatically allocated to things such as the mortgage and paying bills, it’s hard to say. Of the things I actually pay by cash, check or charge: utilities, food, ~~drugs~~pharmaceuticals.

6. Last food you ate?
Salad.

7. First thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Close up: eyes. From a distance: general contour.

9. The school you attend?
See above: I finished college over fifteen years ago.

10. Your mobile phone provider?
Virgin.

11. Favorite store that’s usually in a mall?
Dick’s Sporting Goods. That said, I tend to avoid the mall like The Plague.

12. Whats the longest job you have ever had?
The current one: since October 19, 1992.

13. What do you smell like?
I don’t know.

14. The biggest lie you’ve ever heard?
I’m sure it has to do with the Iraq war, but there were so many…

15. The last time you cried was because why?
Frustration.

16. In your opinion, do long distance relationships work?
Not for me.

17. Do you drink coffee?
No.

18. What do you wanna say to your most recent ex?
“I did love you, you know.”

19. Do you believe in God?
Yes, and is She pissed!

20. Favorite color(s)?
I’ve changed my mind since above. Tangerine trees and marmalade skies.

21. The last person on your missed calls list on your mobile phone?
I don’t give out my number to my mobile phone I use it to call people. I don’t miss calls.

23. How many pillows do you usually sleep with?
One, maybe two if they’re thin.

24. What are you wearing now?
Gray sweatshirt, dark gray sweatpants. I sleep in them.

25. How many pets do you own?
Well, if you count ALL the stuffed animals…

26. What are you doing tomorrow?
Praying for peace.

27. Can you play ping pong?
Yes, but not particularly well.

28. Favorite gender?
Women. The vast majority of my friends have been female since I was about 10.

29. Do you like maps?
I LOVE maps. My grandfather used to give me the maps from his National Geographic, and I probably still have them in a suitcase in the attic, at least some of them.

31. Have you ever attended a themed party?
Yes. A polyester party, after seeing the John Waters film. All the food was marshmallow fluff and the like.

32. Have you ever thrown a party?
I’ve thrown LOTS of parties None recently, though.

33. When did you wake up this morning?
About three a.m.

34. The best thing about winter?
Going to the movies.

35. Last time you were in trouble with the cops?
Well, there was that time in ’72…

38. What are your plans for this weekend?
Catching up on newspapers, taped programming.

39. How many days is it until your birthday?
25.

40. What do you want to be when you “grow up”?
A raconteur.

41. Are you on a laptop?
No.

42. Are you smiling?
No. I’m cold. And tired.

43. Do you miss someone right now?
Sometimes, I miss me.

44. Are you happy?
I’ll be happier next month.

45. Have you ever been in the hospital for an emergency?
Besides the car accident in 1972, there was the time I had an allergic reaction to naprocyn, slept for 24 hours, got dragged to the ER, was dehydrated, and was on an IV for nine hours.

46. Last time you ate chicken?
I eat chicken often. Last night, actually.

47. What jewelry are you wearing?
Besides the ring, nothing.

48. What are you going to do after this survey?
Something else. Get dressed for work.

49. Song you’re listening to?
45 Men in a Telephone Booth.

50. The car you were in last?
Ours.

52. What color shirt are you wearing?
It’s still light gray. What is it with recurring questions in the same blog-quiz, anyway?

53. How long is your hair?
What hair?

54. What’s on your mind right now?
I need to take off some vacation days.

55. Last show you watched?
ABC News.

56. Last thing you drank?
Water.

57. Who was hotter, Ginger or Maryanne?
Mary Ann, who got rooked in the series’ first theme.

No tagging. Anybody crazy enough to do one of these, or all three, is welcome to do so.
ROG

Weird but True

And all happening this past week:

Monday or Tuesday night, my wife was having trouble with my home computer, so I checked it out. When she typed in a URL, it would come in backwards. So www.aol.com would show up as moc.loa.www – and, BTW, it didn’t work. I rebooted – the universal solution to all computer problems – and ended up with no Internet connection at all, so I had to call Time Warner, who do the voodoo they do and fixed it remotely.
***
My work fax is tied to my work e-mail, but I don’t receive very many faxes. Generally, those I do get are junk faxes. But Wednesday morning, I got this letter from the NYS DMV explaining why a woman’s driver’s license was suspended for medical reasons. Below that, I see the woman’s rebuttal as to why the suspension was not medically necessary. Clearly, this fax has been sent to the wrong number – mine – so I looked up her number and left a message explaining what happened. She called me back late that afternoon and thanked me for letting her know that her letter had been waylaid.
***
Ash Wednesday was a cold and rainy-turning-to-icy night. Carol, Lydia and I went to church, then I took Lydia home on the bus, since Carol had a church meeting. We left the light on the front porch. About 8:45 p.m., the doorbell rang. I assumed it was Carol who left her meeting early and didn’t want to fumble with her keys. Instead, it was this woman I did not know, who appeared drunk and/or stoned, who wanted me to call her a cab. Apparently the cell phone in her hand wasn’t working. So I closed the door, got our portable phone, opened the door and started calling taxi companies for her, first from the numbers as she recalled them, then from the Yellow Pages. I let them each ring over 10 times and got no answer – this was six or seven different companies, a couple I called twice. Finally, I got one who said a cab would be there in 45 minutes. The woman on the porch asked, “It’s coming, right?” And I said yes, but I didn’t give her a time frame. I felt sorry for her, since it was cold and wet out, but I was disinclined to let her in since 1) she appeared wrecked, 2) I had my daughter in the house and 3) the woman was smoking a cigarette, with a very long ash that had somehow stayed intact. About 20 minutes later, I looked on the porch, but the woman wasn’t there. Twenty minutes after that, my wife got home; the woman was still gone. Thirty minutes after THAT, or over an hour after I had called the taxi company, I heard beeping in front of our house, which I assumed was the cab; whether the woman ever got on it, I’ll never know.
***
Wednesday night into Thursday, I sneezed in my sleep and bit the left side of my tongue. Boy, that hurt!
***
I was on the bus Tuesday night, Primary Night in New York and elsewhere, heading to the polls. This woman I know only from riding the bus was telling this story – not just to me, but anyone within earshot – about a dream she had had the night before: There was a terrorist attack on Washington in early November 2008. President Bush declared martial law and postponed the elections. It was later discovered that the Bush administration had planned and executed the bombing itself.
The woman telling the story then explains how she woke up screaming and her upstairs neighbor ran downstairs to see if she was all right. He was about to call 911.
***
I won’t even get into talking about my WORK computer, which died – as in as though someone pulled the plug – a week ago Friday thrice, Monday thrice, and Tuesday once, went to another computer, which did the same thing once on Wednesday.
An

ROG

Who’ll Be the Veep QUESTION

My friend Deborah in France turned me on to this website where one can subtitle one’s own Bollywood movie, and then send it on to friends. Her fine example can be found here, while my attempt is located here:

My piece, which I did on Wednesday or Thursday, after Super Tuesday, but before Mitt Romney suspended his campaign, is based on the fact that, barring a meteor crash, we in the United States will be electing as president the first person to move directly from the U.S. Senate to the White House since JFK.

So, who then, will be the Vice-Presidential candidate for:
Clinton?
Obama?
McCain?
Two parts: who SHOULD they pick? Who WILL they pick?
My thoughts:
They all need to pick a governor, or former governor. Doesn’t mean it’ll happen.
Clinton: It’ll have to be a man; I don’t think that’s a sexist observation, but a political one. The geography: someone from the South or the West. Too bad the governor of Montana doesn’t have more electoral votes to offer. I suppose it could be Senator Obama.
Obama: It should be someone with foreign policy experience.
In each case, former candidate, and current governor of New Mexico, Bill Richardson keeps popping up on my list. The governor of Kansas who is a woman, and who gave the response to the State of the Union, is an Obama supporter, but two Midwesterners doesn’t seem to balance the ticket. In any case, I seriously doubt it’ll be Obama-Clinton.
McCain: I have a dollar and two case quarters that it won’t be Mike Huckabee. If the Democrats don’t put a woman on the ticket, maybe the Republicans will. And if McCain gives up trying to appease the “true conservatives” (whatever that means) who seem to hate his guts, maybe he could pick a moderate such as Sen. Olympia Snowe of Maine.

Here’s a PDF of all the current governors. I’d be surprised if one of them is not on the national ticket, probably one whose term DOESN’T end in 2009.

ROG

Iron-Poor Blood

I thought it was winter malaise. But when I went to donate blood last week, I was rejected for not having enough red cells. Actually, the correct terminology is deferred, since if the situation changes, I can try again.)
Specifically, my blood count would have been acceptable if I had had a hemoglobin at or above 12.5 g/dL, and mine was 12.3. They used to use this solution to see if my blood would sink, and then more recently some sort of centrifuge to make sure I had a hematocrit at or above 38%, which I always did.

Still, the nice Red Cross lady, my neighbor Shirley, gave me juice and cookies anyway. Then I went to the barber shop and then home to bed.

This is slightly peculiar to me, for this is the first time in over 10 years that I’ve been deferred for this reason, during which I’ve probably donated 50 of my 120 times.

Here’s something I didn’t know: generally speaking, they test a man’s blood pressure first then test the iron content. For women, it’s the other way around. It’s because men tend to have more high blood pressure referrals (over 180/100) than women, and women tend towards anemia more than men. Naturally, being a contrarian, my BP was 116/74.

My plot now is to consume lots of liver and spinach. Here’s a list. I see haggis is on the roster; I think I’ll pass. I’ll stick with lean red meats, seafood, beans, iron-fortified whole grains, and greens (naturally). I’m fascinated by the fact that the can of apricots I have shows no appreciable iron noted on the label, yet dried fruits, such as raisins, prunes, dates and, yes, apricots, are on the list.

Do they still make Geritol?

ROG

MOVIE REVIEW: Ratatouille

In the mid 1980s, I lived in this apartment in Albany where there was a big field in the back. I suffered the most virulent mouse invasion I’ve ever experienced. It wasn’t just mice in the low cabinets and along the floor boards. It was beasties in the upper cabinets. I remember putting a box of elbow macaroni on top of the refrigerator and discovered that a live mouse was still in it. Ultimately I set traps, usually four each night for about three weeks before the mouse hotline alerted its fellow travelers that this was not a safe house to be in.

The very premise of a movie about a rodent, a RAT, no less, preparing food was, to say the least, unappealing to me. Still, I went to the parlor of my church a couple Tuesdays ago, and saw Ratatouille with eight other adults, and no children. In fact, I may have been the youngest one there. I was totally captivated by this film. Among other things, there are scenes that are laugh-out-loud hysterical.

Establishing Remy as a sympathetic iconoclast foodie allows the rest of the story to flow, from Remy finding the once-famed Gusteau’s restaurant in Paris to saving the young man Linguini from culinary disaster to what follows. There is a frantic wonder in that early kitchen scene that was breathtaking. If the movie isn’t quite up to that level throughout, it’s still high on my list of favorite films for the year.

This is yet another PIXAR success. In addition to the wonderful writing and direction of Brad Bird, and luscious artwork, I loved the voice actors, including Patton Oswalt as Remy and Lou Romano as Linguini, plus Ian Holm, Brian Dennehy, Peter Sohn, Brad Garrett, Janeane Garofalo, Will Arnett, and Peter O’Toole as the food critic Anton Ego.

ROG