Ambivert, or an approximation thereof

secrets

Ambivert
From The Bad Chemicals. Used by permission.

When I’ve said to people that I am an introvert, some people laugh. “You’re so friendly,” or some such.

So I’ve decided to try on the term ambivert. It showed up on my radar recently via one of those Word A Day emails I get. “MEANING: noun: One having the characteristics of both an extrovert and an introvert. NOTES: An ambivert is one who can be an extrovert or an introvert depending on the situation.”

Maybe that’s correct. The MacMillan Dictionary notes: “The word ambivert was created by American social scientist Kimball Young in 1927.” Ah, the year my mom was born.

Ambiverts often:

Enjoy social settings but also crave time alone.I NEED time alone. But I do all right in social settings.

Have a good sense of when to trust others and when to hold back. I tend to be in the “hold back” category unless I trust the people.

Feel comfortable almost anywhere, whether in a loud restaurant with a large group of friends or home alone reading a book. Well, maybe with a small group of friends, pre-pandemic. And almost never in a loud setting. Even in my twenties, I found the cacophony of a large group impossible to hold a decent conversation in. I’ll take a book or magazine.

Give me a break!

Feel an urge to take breaks from social activities. THAT is undeniably true. But currently, I crave it. A lot, actually.

Have excellent communication skills and are good listeners. I communicate OK. But, even going back to high school, I was a very good listener. It was almost an odd Father Confessor thing, except I didn’t get into the absolution aspect. I know LOTS of secrets people have been willing to share with me over the years.

Have difficulty making decisions. Not really. Certainly not now. I get a menu, eyeball it, and make a decision quickly. My wife once bought me a winter coat for Christmas. The first coat I put on that was warm enough and looked good, I picked; ten minutes. My wife said, “Don’t you want to try on some others?” No, thanks.

Work well alone or in groups. I do work well alone. Whether I work well in groups depends on the functionality, or dysfunction, of the collective.

Get along with lots of different kinds of people. I actually believe this true. One of my blogger friends is a self-described conservative Republican but we can count on each other in difficult times.
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Make good entrepreneurs. In the latter stages of my time there, I was really good at facilitating the running of an extant operation, FantaCo. This allowed the owner, Tom, to deal with the “big picture” issues. Having worked as a librarian helping small businesses for over a quarter-century, I know what steps to take, and likely, how to operate it. What I lack is, as Bush 41 put it, the “vision thing,” some product or service I’d be so personally invested in that I’d want to hang out my shingle.

So maybe I’m an introvert-leaning ambivert.

 

I am an introvert – seriously

“Unlike extroverts who gain energy from social interaction, introverts have to expend energy in social situations.”

Myths About Introverts Busted
From HERE
I am an introvert. There are people I know, and know well, who think otherwise. They are incorrect.

The article 8 Signs You’re an Introvert notes: “It is… important to note that introversion is not the same things as social anxiety or shyness. Being an introvert does not mean that you are socially anxious or shy.”

I used to be socially anxious, but through repetition, I’ve learned not to care as much. Public gaffes I have made, which would have put me into a funk for days – or much longer – I generally deal with with self-deprecating humor.

“People who are introverted tend to be inward turning, or focused more on internal thoughts, feelings and moods rather than seeking out external stimulation.

“Unlike extroverts who gain energy from social interaction, introverts have to expend energy in social situations. After attending a party or spending time in a large group of people, introverts often feel a need to ‘recharge’ by spending a period of time alone.

“This does not mean that the average introvert wants to be alone all the time. Many introverts love spending time with friends and interacting with familiar people in social situations.”

So if I am affable at church, which I generally am, it’s because I’ve been there almost two decades, and I have developed a certain degree of comfort.

“While introverts typically do not enjoy a great deal of socializing, they do enjoy having a small group of friends to whom they are particularly close.”

Technology is wonderful in this regard. The emails I’ve spent with Catbird down south, after meeting for the first time in well over a decade have been quite meaningful. I actually have done a couple video chats with friend Deborah in France, after not seeing her for nearly three decades until 2018.

On the same recent weekend I spent 90 minutes on the telephone with one sister and two hours with Uthaclena. Old school!

“Because introverts tend to be inward-turning, they also spend a great deal of time examining their own internal experiences.” Goodness, yes.

Noted author and clear introvert John Green (no relation) did a video recently Battling Apathy and Searching for Meaning, which I related to – a lot.

“Where extroverts tend to prefer to jump right in and learn through hands-on experience, introverts typically prefer learning through observation…

“When introverts do learn from personal experience, they prefer to practice somewhere private where they can build their skills and abilities without having to perform for an audience.” Check.

Blogging is actually a useful tool for the introvert. It allows me to “put myself out there” in a controlled environment.

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Instead of Dumbing Down

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Flooding of Coast, Caused by Global Warming, Has Already Begun; Scientists’ warnings that the rise of the sea would eventually imperil the US coastline are no longer theoretical

How Trolls Are Ruining the Internet

The Falling Man

The FBI Accused Him of Terrorism; He Couldn’t Tie His Shoes

The Aurora shooting survivors’ $700,000 legal bill shows the difficult reality of one Colorado law

Risky alone, deadly together Overdosing on prescription drug combinations plays a part in the growing rates of premature death among white women

White people think racism is getting worse, against white people

White privilege has enormous implications for policy — but whites don’t think it exists

‘He paid a dear price for it’: The 19th-century ordeal of one of America’s first transgender men

JEWEL OF THE NILE and why Ken Levine will be forever haunted by it

Who is Funding the Backlash against John Oliver’s Charter School Critique?

‘Playing Joan Crawford ruined my career’: Faye Dunaway says Mommie Dearest changed the way Hollywood thought of her

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One in Four Americans Didn’t Read a Book Last Year, But don’t mourn the death of the printed word just yet

Introvert Hangovers Can Be Really Rough

Hugh O’Brian, Star of TV’s Wyatt Earp, Dies at 91

Actor Jon Polito, known for roles in Coen brother films ‘The Big Lebowski’ and ‘Miller’s Crossing,’ dead at 65

Trouble with Comics contributor Tim Durkee passed away

Woman in iconic WWII Times Square kiss photograph dies at 92

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Dozens of higher education institutions in New York state will stop asking applicants whether they have past criminal convictions

Jerry Lewis returns, at 90

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Dan Van Riper: We Walked The Entire Rail Trail From the South End of Albany all the way to Voorheesville

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Early comics reading and A Number 1 By Any Other Name, both featuring moi

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