Movie review: The Quiet Girl

feeling invisible

My wife and I saw the film The Quiet Girl at the Spectrum Theatre in Albany in early April.

The first time we see the title character Cáit (Catherine Clinch), she’s hiding in the high grass around her home in rural Ireland, c. 1981. She is neglected and feels invisible in her dysfunctional family, and her mother is pregnant with yet another child.

So she’s shipped off to stay with a somewhat older couple distantly related to the family. At first, she is reserved with the pair, but eventually, she comes to appreciate their care.

Her foster father tells someone about Cáit: “Many’s the person missed the opportunity to say nothing and lost much because of it.”

Yet even though the foster mom said there were no secrets, there was one.

This is a relatively simple story told exceedingly well. The Quiet Girl was nominated for several awards, including Best International Feature Film, representing Ireland, at the 2023 Academy Awards. It was deemed Best Foreign Film at the AARP Movies for Grownups Awards.

From the Berlin International Film Festival: “As many films in this year’s Generation Kplus competition, the winning film deals with the hardships of family life. It is a film with a delicate story full of details about childhood, grief, parenthood, and rebuilding a family. The very strong narrative is combined with a stunning cinematography. The sound and the images create a unique atmosphere.”

Leaving

One oddity at the weekday matinee we attended with about a dozen others. A couple sitting left after about five minutes. Was it because the film had subtitles? I don’t know. Sometimes, I could understand the dialogue, and sometimes I had to read it, but it was not an overly talky film, so I found their departure curious.

Folks turning 70 in May 2023

Oingo Boingo

Here’s a list of notable people turning 70 in May 2023. I’m SO much older than they are.

Tony Blair (6th). I had hope for him when he became the youngest Prime Minister of the United Kingdom in 1997. He worked for a minimum wage, and he supported LGBTQ rights. But in his second term, he supported W’s foolhardy invasion of Iraq.

Alex Van Halen (8th) – the only time I mentioned the drummer of Van Halen in this blog was as Eddie’s brother.

I  have one CD by Mike Oldfield (15th), which has nothing to do with Tubular Bells; I have it on vinyl, considered a precursor to new-age music.

George Brett (15th) was a Hall of Fame third baseman, playing over 20 years for the Kansas City Royals. Yet, I still think of him regarding the pine tar incident on July 24, 1983.

Pierce Brosnan (16th) played in a detective series Remington Steele, which I viewed. Other folks watching thought he should play James Bond, and he did in five films, though I saw none of them.  I did see him in Mrs. Doubtfire and Mamma Mia!

Oddly, I most remember him by how much he loved his first wife, Cassandra Harris, and her children. Cassie died in 1991, and her daughter Charlotte died in 2013, both of ovarian cancer.

“When your partner gets cancer, then life changes. Your timetable and reference for your normal routines and the way you view life, all this change. Because you’re dealing with death. You’re dealing with the possibility of death and dying…  Cassie was very positive about life. I mean, she had the most amazing energy and outlook on life. It was and is a terrible loss, and I see it reflected, from time to time, in my children.”

Doc Ock

Before I knew who he was, Alfred Molina (24th) was in many movies, including Raiders of the Lost Ark. I saw him in Chocolat, Frida, An Education, and primarily as Doctor Octopus in Spider-Man movies. I didn’t know he was born in London.

Danny Elfman (29th) is such a prolific composer of film scores that I don’t know where to start. From the Wikipedia page: “Elfman has frequently worked with directors Tim Burton, Sam Raimi, and Gus Van Sant, contributing music to nearly 20 Burton projects, including Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure, BatmanEdward Scissorhands,… as well as scoring Raimi’s A Simple PlanSpider-Man and Spider-Man 2, and Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, and Van Sant’s Academy Award–winning films Good Will Hunting and Milk. He wrote music for the Men in Black franchise films, the songs and score for Henry Selick’s animated musical The Nightmare Before Christmas, and the themes for the popular television series Desperate Housewives and The Simpsons.” I’ve seen every single film mentioned above.

“Among his honors are four Oscar nominations, two Emmy Awards, a Grammy,… the 2015 Disney Legend Award  and the Society of Composers & Lyricists Lifetime Achievement Award in 2022.

Yet I will link to the video for Weird Science by his band Oingo Boingo, which he is now mortified by.

This blog is old enough to vote

6,575 days in a row

This blog is old enough to vote. It’s Eighteen, and I like it!

In February, fillyjonk wrote: “It’s weird to think of how much stuff I’ve lived through in the time I have been writing this blog.” I realized how true that was.

Bloggers who get up and write a post or create one the night before are remarkable. I cannot do that anymore, though I wrote that way for the first three years when scheduling a post on the Blogger platform was not an option.  Now the idea makes me exhausted.

I try to write every day, but it won’t necessarily be posted soon. If there is something I know I want to say about Labor Day, I’ll write it, even if it’s July. If I don’t know what to write about, I create a music year post because I know that in October 2029, I will need a post about the #1 hits of 1999.

Also, I rearrange my posts like crazy. I wrote several blog posts in succession when I saw many movies.  But I didn’t want to post many reviews in a row. My working theory is that if whatever I post about today doesn’t strike your fancy, maybe tomorrow’s item will be more to your liking.

Also, some posts are time-sensitive, while others can be pushed back a day or a week. I have about a half dozen posts, which are evergreen. You may never see them unless I become seriously ill or injured.

Politics

Ultimately, I blog for two reasons. One, which I’ve stated several times, is that I don’t know what I think about many issues until I write about them. Sometimes, I change my mind, at least in part, or at least see another point of view.

Oddly, I don’t LIKE writing about divisive topics. Yet, I can’t NOT write about them sometimes. For instance, there have been four Presidents, and I penned something about all of them; unfortunately, there is too much about one in particular.

To my recollection, I never wrote about abortion before Roe was overturned. I never felt that I had to. And now I do.

I never want to write about race here. And I never cannot, mainly when it involves someone dying unjustly, such as here or here.
Relationship

The other reason for blogging is about community.  When I started writing, I made electronic acquaintances with some folks on my friend Fred Hembeck’s link page.

My dedication to this enterprise prompted the Times Union to ask me to blog there from 2008 to 2021. I’ve kept in touch with some of those folks even after the TU killed the community blog.

I was involved with ABC Wednesday for over twelve years, even running it for five years.

Initially, I participated in Sunday Stealing as a quick way to write a post. I’ve found I like making and receiving comments from those folks.
How long?

I don’t know how long I’ll keep up this daily blogging routine. Part of it is dealing with the technological part. When Kelly was having functionality problems with his blog, it discouraged me. Occasionally I have technical difficulties, and I cannot fix them myself.

I hope that the site will survive me via the Internet Archive, “a non-profit library of millions of free books, movies, software, music, websites, and more.

The first five years of my blog are still available here. And my emergency backup is out there somewhere.

Shooting at strangers

“unpaved private driveway is not lighted”

The three stories of men shooting at strangers who made mistakes of address or car make have troubled me more than I would have imagined.

In the local paper, the Times Union – it’s a local, as well as a national story – Chris Churchill describes the shooting at a car that mistakenly pulled up in the wrong driveway as “our deadly culture of fear.”

“Something is far more wrong if the immediate reaction is to grab a gun and begin firing. That leads to tragedy as heartbreaking as the death of a 20-year-old from Schuylerville who dreamed of becoming a marine biologist. Kaylin Gillis is described by those who knew her as ‘such a sweet girl, with a kind heart and big smile.'”

From the news story: “The lead slug that allegedly killed Gillis is designed to kill large game and is roughly three times bigger than a round fired by a handgun. [The accused, Kevin] Monahan likely would not need a permit to possess that firearm, according to multiple law enforcement sources.

“The unpaved private driveway is not lighted, and the only markers are mailbox numbers along the public road. The couple’s home sits at the top of the steep, curving driveway that hides its porch and the front entrance of the house from view. The property has several faded signs warning against trespassing.

“No one from the group had exited the car or tried to enter Monahan’s house… But as the car tried to turn around and leave to go back down the driveway, Monahan allegedly came out on his porch and fired twice — one of the rounds struck Gillis.”

Her friends desperately drove around in rural Washington County, seeking a  signal to call 911.

It’s a miracle

How 16-year-old Ralph Yarl survived being shot in the head by an 84-year-old homeowner after going to the wrong  Kansas City address seems nothing less than miraculous. There may be a racial component in this story.  The assailant reportedly shot Mr. Yarl a second time when he was already down.

Two cheerleaders,  Heather Roth, and Payton Washington, were shot in a Texas supermarket parking lot after one opened the door to the wrong vehicle. Ms. Washington was seriously wounded. These three events occurred within a week of each other.

Six-year-old Kinsley White of Gastonia, NC, was grazed on the cheek by a bullet after a man started shooting when a basketball rolled into his yard. This is, per a similar story, “the toxic stew of fear, paranoia, and distrust that influences so many and leads to violence.”

As a Boston Globe column points out,  There is no pro-life in a country that shoots its kids.

The Weekly Sift notes: “The NRA likes to say that ‘an armed society is a polite society’ (a quote Psychology Today critiqued last year). But these incidents make the opposite point: In an armed society, misunderstandings and trivial conflicts easily become life-threatening. In each of these cases, someone is dead or badly wounded because there was a gun involved. In each case, we can be thankful that no ‘good guy with a gun’ was ready to shoot back. Who knows what the body count would have been?”

Visceral

Of course, it’s guns – it often is –  but it’s more than that. Stand-your-ground laws may affect the mentality of the citizenry, even in states such as New York, where the doctrine does not exist.

With so much societal violence, why did these stories resonate with me so much? Part of it is that I have a child in the age cohort of some victims.

Also, I think it’s a reflection of the loss of grace. I’ve been in cars that have turned into the wrong driveway several times.  Rural roads are challenging to navigate, especially at night.

About a decade ago, my daughter, her friend K, and I all started to get into a car at the 20 Mall near Albany in the evening. It LOOKED like my wife’s car. It was the make and model and a similar year. There was an unfamiliar woman in the driver’s seat. We all departed quickly, and I apologized. Subsequently, my wife pointed her car fob at the wrong vehicle more than once.

As someone who has worked the 1990 and 2020 Census and carried petitions for a judicial candidate, I was threatened once during each process, though no weapons were brandished.

I Googled “loss of social skills.” Articles are blaming the isolation from COVID and social media/technology. Many of the articles in the latter category long predate the pandemic.

An article about mental illness notes: “If we pursue proven measures designed to prevent access to firearms among people most at risk for perpetrating violence at their riskiest times, we will be moving significantly in the right direction.” Neither of the alleged shooters in Kansas City or upstate New York would have met the criteria for taking away their guns.

As is often the case, I don’t know how to fix this.

Sunday Stealing: League

a scar

This week’s Sunday Stealing is called League because it was stolen, once again, from the  League of Extraordinary Penpals.

1. My favorite sources for delicious recipes

I have an old Betty Crocker cookbook. The one downside is that it calls for certain-sized cans or boxes, but shrinkflation has altered them. For instance, a lasagna recipe suggests 32-ounce cans of sauce, but now they come in 28 ounces.

2. If I had to repeat a day over & over, how I’d want it to go

It would involve writing, doing genealogy, reading, watching JEOPARDY, and going to choir.

3. Who or what has saved my life

Possibly this blog. It has allowed me to clarify my thoughts. But also the community of bloggers because writing this merely for my improvement would be boring.

4. Something I can never seem to start or finish

Cleaning my office, which would be evident if you saw it.

5. How my taste in food has changed over the years

As a kid, I hated almost all vegetables. I actually like broccoli and several others now. But I now despise most canned vegetables. I tried canned spinach a few years ago, which I would eat as a kid, probably hypnotized by Popeye, and I found it VILE.  Give me fresh or if necessary, frozen. 

6. The last time I cried

I was undoubtedly listening to music. But they weren’t sad tears; they were happy tears. Maybe it was As by Stevie Wonder.

7. The best parts of human nature

I think most people want to help if they can.

8. Concepts and ideas that bend my mind

I’ve been watching a lot about Artificial Intelligence and how it can be used for good.  Or not. This 60 Minutes piece speaks to this.

9. What I’m most likely to ask for help with
Something technological
Tumble
10. The story behind one of my scars

When I was three years old, I fell down the stairs between my grandparents’ place and ours. There is a scar below my lower lip where facial hair refuses to grow.

11. I’ve never said this out loud…

And I probably won’t write it down here, either.

12. Times I’ve been the leader/the one people count on

Black History Month at my church for at least a decade, being the one in my Bible group to make sure we have the Zoom link. I was in charge of the mail order, balancing the checkbook, and making the bank deposit when I worked at FantaCo, a comic book store, in the 1980s. Undoubtedly other things.

 

13. Whenever I see these people, my heart lights up

The choir people

14. With my financial needs met, here’s how I’d spend my time

Travel, doing genealogy.

15. The people I talk to when I want the truth
My OLD friends, most of whom I have written about in this blog over the past nine months.
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